21 Nov 2015

The coffee, the dinner, the cold shoulder! Date #4 & #5

After the third date going so well and then being so disappointed, I did want to just throw in the towel, and the more I read about others experiences the more depressing it all seemed.

People are weird!

Even the online dating success stories...start with...I met my husband after online dating for *insert relevant number* of years! YEARS! Its been two months and I am about to throw myself out of the cat flap!

The Coffee....

Dates 4 and 5 were with the same person, which is an improvement on the first three, and I was feeling ok. I was much less nervous this time around than I had be.

This may have been because the date was with 'Nice Guy' - I have nicknames for all of them, and his was nice guy because he seemed normal and nice.

I met him for coffee and then we walked around the city for a bit and it was really nice in that respect and at the end of the date he asked me for a second date! I said yes, I wasn't sure about the chemistry but he was funny and we had laughed a lot on the date and I thought, why not?

The only thing that concerned me was that he mentioned his ex a lot...not a big deal..he was the first guy I had ever been out with who:

had a beard
was older than me
had kids

But we did laugh a lot, and I was not sure he liked me like that, in true Katy style I asked him and he said he was. So I thought...ok, lets look forward to the next date! 

The Dinner...

The dinner was nice, we talked some more, we laughed a lot. Again he mentioned the ex when I asked about his work - apparently his boss is like his ex - which of course made me wonder. And....in true Katy style I asked him if he still had issues with his ex....he said no so I took him at his word.

When we left the restaurant, he held my hand and when he dropped me home, we kissed me goodbye.

Later that night, he texted me and we chatted about somethig irrelevant and I was left thinking

he didnt ask me out again
he hasnt mentioned if he enjoyed it
whats the deal

and....yes...in true Katy style (I do like to know where I stand!)...I asked him if he enjoyed the date...he replied....

I did. You?

The cold shoulder....

What kind of reply is that? So I said..I did. And then changed the subject....then I thought...I shall just ask...because I wont go on dates with anyone else until I have finished dating the previous person...so I said...I was just wondering if there was going to be a third date or if he wanted to be friends, either way I would be cool with that.

He said.....

Yep! NOTHING! And he hasn't said anything still....completely blanking me but fear not I have just left it at that...and I am left not knowing why? I don't even need a why...just a simple not interested would do.

It did occur to me when I was having a conversation recently about third dates and people who sleep with a guy on the third date...and i wondered if he thought I was thinking that, there is no way I would have as he was called 'nice guy' for a reason and I knew that if I dated him...I probably wouldn't reach second base till date 6! let alone the whole way...surely with him it would have been date 20? I don't know. All I know is he was a nice guy...who didn't have the balls to tell me to fuck off! Its an annoying characteristic that all these guys say their biggest flaw is that they are too honest...so why are they lying to themselves? 

As you can see, I am very frustrated by this...and I wonder if maybe I am asking too much too soon, but I want someone to like me and my annoying ways.

So...fingers crossed once again that this is the last date I blog about! 

Bowled over! Date #3

Finally, a chance for me to sit down in front of the computer and not trawl for menfolk!

So...where were we...Oh yes! Date three was the last one  had before I began posting about dating and well...hmmm...how to begin!

Firstly, I didn't meet him on the dating site that I am a member of, but on another music related site that I had joined inn the hope of meeting a gig buddy. I never did but I ended up talking to this guy and he seemed keen and all for meeting up soon as which was fine. I spoke to him on the phone a couple of times and it was chilled and easy. We seemed to get along just fine and arranged for a date to go bowling..

When he arrived, as I walked to his car, all I could think was...don't get out the car! Because I knew that would make me like him just a little bit more (see date 1 and 2 if you are wondering why!) and then he did! He gave me a hug when we met and it was a nice big warm hug.

In all honesty the date was good, there was a few things that made me thing it wouldn't work long time without compromise but you know, its a first date, lets not get ahead of ourselves!

When he left he said he would call/text when he got home so that I knew he made it ok (he came quite a way)....so as a worrier by nature....I stayed up all night waiting....and waiting....and waiting...and I don't care if its a dating no-no but I texted him to make sure he wasn't dead! No answer.

I went to work very tired and very disappointed that someone who had been friendly and honest was now ignoring me and I am a grown up, to text me to say...

Hi Kate, I made it home. I don't think you are right for me but have a nice life.

...is that too much to ask? I didn't think so. I still don't think so. My assertiveness on such things is frowned upon in dating guides and i did text him one last time - I didn't say anything mean of bitchy but I did say, he needs to grow a pair.

I guess the fact that he spent the whole date telling me what a twat he was should have sent out some warning signs! Because his behaviour post date was that of a twat!

Another one bites the dust....

Top 10 Things to be thankful for

Todays Top 10 is inspired by Thanksgiving...although I am a week early...so...yeah...its good to plan ahead!

So...here is my list...

  1. Family
  2. Online friends
  3. Work friends
  4. Health
  5. A job
  6. Kindness
  7. Peace
  8. Chocolate
  9. Laughter 
  10. Tears

THANK YOU!!! xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

14 Nov 2015

Quick link for introverts

So as I sit here waiting for the time to leave to meet my coffee date...I came across this...

I thought of all us introverts and I think the point about how we seem to focus on our negatives instead of positives was quite apt! 

So just so you all know and are in no doubt..:


Now go have some great weekend ;) 

Kate x

12 Nov 2015

Top 10 things to leave on a desert island!

Well, with my time keeping of late I think that I should be one of the things left on there! 

I do promise to get back to Tuesday's once I get settled into a routine. 

I am behind in so much but IHSW weekend will hopefully help me turn that all around! I have two ornaments to stitch as I never finished my angel! 

Anyway, these will be short and sweet but straight from the heart...

Top 10 things to leave on a desert island...

1. Me right now! I'm so flakey.
2. Sweetcorn, I can't even begin to explain the visceral hatred that I have for this vegetable...it has to go! 
3. Mushrooms, I am not keen so why not join the sweetcorn? I'm mean but I'm not heartless! Lol vegetables together...awe
4. Tights! Just because anyone who read about my first date will know they tried to shame me! 
5. Butterflies - those things are creepy & would appreciate a desert island more. 

Ok, so i am missing five things from the list, I really thought I hated more stuff than I do.

So I shall come back and add things when they occur to me! 

So go check out keebs and tiffs lists!