21 Dec 2012

Bad Santa Blog Hop 2012

I fancied a little break from the fun and frolics of my christmas rom-com with Ryan and Sarah and thought I would enter a short story in the Bad Santa Blog Hop 2012. There is a link at the bottom to all the other entrants or alternatively just click on the link above. I'd be happy for any feedback and hope you enjoy it.

Whatever you do this Christmas, be nice!


Santa sat on the sleigh and pulled the list from his inside pocket. He had checked it once already but he needed to be sure. There in black and white was the name of the child who lived at this address and in large bold lettering beside it was stamped 'NAUGHTY'. He shoved the list back into his pocket and heaved himself out of the sleigh. He clambered onto the chimney stack and peered down the chute, sighing he tightened his belt, pulled up his boots and swung a leg over. After 700 years of doing this it was beginning to get old, one of the few things that was, he hadn't asked to be Santa and it was only since he changed the rules a little that he got any enjoyment from it. He swung the next leg over and with a pelvic thrust and a wiggle of his nose he effortlessly slid down to reach the main room of the house.

He was here for the naughty child. He wouldn't stop to eat the cookies & mince pies or to collect a carrot for Rudy, he wouldn't sup his sherry or drink his milk. There would be no placing of gifts under the tree. He had grown tired of children not believing in the naughty list and thinking he was just a big softy.  It was only when he came for them that they realised their mistakes, sometimes they begged him not to take them, sometimes they kicked and screamed but in the end they accepted their fate. When he returned home each year with a new batch of naughties the elves would shudder in terror and he would laugh and a big, deep, belly full of Ho Ho Ho's would echo through the workshop. 

Santa, took in a deep raspy breath and wheezed a little as he headed up the stairs to collect his new addition. It didn't take him long to find the child he had come for; his bed unmade, his floor covered in broken and discarded toys, and awake on Christmas eve and sat up looking out of the window and writing swear words in the condensation. The boy turned around when he heard Santa's breathing and his eyes widened in disbelief, he started to smile but something about the twinkle in St Nicks eye filled him with horror. He didn't have a chance to scream or cry out before Santa placed the sack over his head and carried him out.

For Santa, this year Christmas would be no different and if he was honest, he much preferred them to Turkey anyway.


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19 comments:

  1. HOLY KID EATING SANTA BATMAN! That was brilliant and wonderfully unexpected. Thanks so much for entering.

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    1. Thank you for reading it! I'm off to read the others now :)

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  2. Hells bells, Santa eats kids for lunch - brilliant !!!

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  3. Great Scott!! Does he add stuffing before cooking?! Wonderfully imaginative!! ;)

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    1. Thanks :) I daren't allow myself to think of it!

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  4. Loved the twist...not what I was expecting! He he!

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    1. Thank you! Those pesky kids really should be nice! Hehe

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  5. And I thought my Santa was bad for making the kids staff his workshop!

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    1. Ooh! I shall come over and see, that doesn't sound nice of him. :)

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  6. Glad you got the story in on time because it's great fun! Certainly an original spin on old Nick!

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    1. It was fun and I needed a break from my current story. Thanks for stopping by!

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  7. Loved it...loved it...loved it!!...Every parent should have a copy of this to read to their kids....( I'll certainly be passing it on!!!...Muwahahaha )

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    1. I'll start printing them asap....lopl!

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  8. Imaginative twist at the end. Didn't see that coming. Well done Katy.

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    1. Thank you! I like to keep you on your toes ;)

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  9. Now that is one BAD santa. Bloody hell! Love it.

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  10. EVIL Santa! This gives a whole new incentive to children to be nice rather than naughty. Double yikes!

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I really appreciate you taking the time to comment. Spill the beans...

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